Monday, January 8, 2007

A Man's Guide to Pregnancy

I highly recommend this book to any - uh - man, who now or in the future may be, is living with a woman who is pregnant.

Book highlights:

Unbelievable things that you’d
better believe
1) Your wife’s feet are going to grow to roughly the size
of an elephant’s.
2) No matter how well you plan, you’re going to forget a
whole bunch of things.
3) A human being the size of a small watermelon is going
to burst out of a spot the size of walnut.
4) You’re going to talk to a stomach.
5) Everybody you meet is going to know more about
being pregnant than you.

Handy Saying Chart
The following is a guide you can carry with you so you always know
the right thing to say—or not.
Don't SayDo Say
Man, your feet look like elephant's.Would you like a foot rub?
Yes, you're fat.You've never looked better
Of course I'm scared to death about having this babyOf course this baby will be a change in our lives.  But working together we can make it a change for the better
I'm not doing diapers!I'll do diapers.
Lamaze class was sure stupid tonightLamaze class was sure informative tonight
I'm going out, see you when I get backI'm going out, what do you need?
What's for dinner?Let's go out for dinner.

No comments: